Ok. I hate school. I'm also fighting the urge to swear while typing this.

Here's an exerpt from my latest blog entry, and ignore the cheerfullness of it- I feel far from cheerful now. And I do not love my art school.:

--x--

I'm planning on transfering schools.

Yeah. I really love my art school, but I'm struggling. It's not fun anymore... I cry a lot, have anxiety attacks, and doubt myself. A lot. I feel like my art isn't up to par with my classmates'. You should see some of the things they create, and then look at my crap. :/

--x--

That said, I want to transfer to Emerson College in Boston for a writing major, because I have way more talent in writing. I said in the blog entry that my stuff is crap. Actually it's sh!t. Come and see the stuff other kids at school do. I'm serious this time- I am not good. At my 1st ever review last year they said I have high school level work. That's right. And guess what? I'm not really a junior- I had to repeat the year. Because my stuff is sh!t.

I embarrassed myself last year by crying in my classes.

I'm banging into a brick wall with school- no matter what I do and how hard I try I get the same results. And I can't stand it anymore. I have no idea how I got into this f*cking school.

I feel much more enthusiastic about Emerson. Way more than I ever did at my school now. When I have to do something for school now I think "I have to do this" instead of "I want to do this." That's not healthy.

My parents are supporting me about my decision. It's my life and I'm not waiting for anyone's approval. If I even go to school tomorrow (I really don't want to) I'm going to tell my good friend, and I don't know how she'll react.

I really don't want to use this website anymore. It's too painful looking at all these younger people produce stuff that I could never do. Plus I still want my own personal website. I've been detached from deviantart for a while. So I will leave, but I won't take down my pictures. Great.

I want to get into Emerson, and I started my application. I can't wait to get out of here.

I feel sick right now. I think my face is salty. Yeah. Goodbye.